On My Own
"On My Own!” – this is a motto of the XXI century women. It has penetrated into all life spheres. A womanraises children on her own, builds career and business, travels around the world, plans her life. She doesn’t depend on the man and circumstances and is used to rely only on herself. Recalling the harsh patriarchal past and lack of rights for women, we can say that women are finally allowed to do everything. Now a woman can do everything on her own!
But why is there no joyful euphoria about it?
Because with all this a woman also remains by herself. By herself in a cozy apartment. By herself in the most comfortable travels. By herself in cold relationship. By herself in the whole world.
“On My Own” oppressively flows into loneliness. No, not the one described as spent under a warm plaid and with a cup of sweet tea. But the one which does not please with time for yourself, feminine pleasures and escaping form the hectic world to your own cave.
Loneliness with bitter tears flowing down your cheeks which squeezes the throat to pain. Loneliness which paints your weekdays and holidays into grey color. Which becomes not a soul friend for you, but a ruthless cold enemy. Loneliness which brings you misery.
What should you do when you can’t help yourself?
Firstly, you should understand, better accompanied by a specialist, if the feeling of loneliness is caused by the depression. If it is, there is only one way out – to go to a doctor and start curing. If not, read further.
Secondly, ask yourself: “How do you want it to be?” Answer frankly and during 10-15 minutes. Answers to this question will show you what you actually want. It may be relationship, social ties’ establishing, support and realization. The main thing is to understand what your life lacks. And one more small nuance – instead of this you, most likely unconsciously, have filled your life with loneliness.
Thirdly, the issue of secondary benefits is relevant here, too. To know why loneliness has warmed in your soul and life, try to figure out what the loneliness brings to you. Don’t hurry up to say “Nothing!”, “I don’t know”. One of the most important laws of psyche tells that we need all we have. I agree, you don’t want to believe, but it is a fact. So, having done this task you will see which of your important needs are realized with the help of loneliness.
And here is when an important moment comes – the choice: to leave everything as it is, or to change the situation.
Hopefully, you choose the second option:-)
The opposite to loneliness is something more than one.
But a woman sometimes lives in the illusion that relationships, friendship, social ties appear by themselves, have to be initiated by someone else. Try to go a new way – show interest in another human. Sometimes banal, but sincere “How are you?” is enough.
On the other hand, you may feel lonely even among people, being socially active. If it is about you, you should immediately pay attention to yourself.
Exactly! A woman begins to feel lonely when she is not interesting for herself, when she doesn’t know what to take up, when internal supports are ruined. This is the time to get to know yourself, let yourself experiment with desires, create a new reality for yourself.
However, the loneliness may be a shelter for a woman. This is where she has escaped from the world which is cruel to her. It’s a pity that a woman came through a situation when she decided to close from the outer world. Trust and belief are what she should learn, if she is tired of the safe loneliness.
In this world there is nothing that can’t be turned by a woman to her advantage. So, if loneliness has become a devastating burden for you, start changing it. And the Universe will always give wonderful opportunities for happy changes.
Let your life be full of moments during which you could enjoy time with yourself. ..
And let you have enough joyful communication with your beloved, friends, new people and the world;-)
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